Is the year actually coming to an end???

Well sweet mommas, the end is near!! Christmas is upon us and the New Year is just around the corner. I pray that all is well and you aren't too consumed in all the planning and preparing to remember the true meaning for Christmas........

I would like to share a poem that I found in a magazine that I was flipping through at my last doctor appointment. I hope it brings a smile upon your face!!! Merry Christmas to all!! Love you all and see you in 2012.

I AM TODDLER.....HEAR ME ROAR!

If it is on-I must turn it off.

If it is off-I must turn it on.

If it is folded-I must unfold it.

If it is a liquid-It must be shaken, then spilled.

If it is a solid-then it must be crumbled, chewed or smeared.

It is high-it must be reached.

If it is shelved-it must be unshelved.

If it is pointed-it must be ran with at top speed.

If it has leaves-they must be picked.

If it is plugged-it must be unplugged.

If it is not trash-it must be thrown away.

If it is in the trash-it must be removed, inspected and thrown in the floor.

If it is closed-it must be opened.

If it does not open-it must be screamed at.

If it has drawers-they must be rifled thru.

If it is a pencil-it must write on the refrigerator, monitor, table or walls.

If it is full-it wil be more interesting when emptied.

If it is a pile of dirt-it must be laid upon.

If it is a stroller-I must not ride in it without protest-I must push it instead.

If it has a flat surface-it must be banged upon.

If Mommy's hands are full-I must be carried.

If Mommy's in a hurry and wants to carry me-I must walk alone.

If it is paper-it must be torn.

If it has buttons-they must be pressed.

If the volume is low-It must go high.

If it is toilet paper-it must be unrolled on the floor.

If it is a drawer-it must be pulled upon.

If it is a toothbrush-it must be inserted intom my mouth.

If it is a faucet-it must be turned on at full force.

If it is a phone-I must talk on it.

If it is a bug-it must be swallowed.

If it doesn not stay on my spoon-it must be dropped to the floor.

If it is not food-it must be tasted.

If it is dry-it must be made wet with drool, milk, or toilet water.

If it is a car seat-it must be protested with an arched back.

If it's a Mommy or a Daddy-it must be hugged adn kissed!

                                                                                                            Author unknown

Our craft day!!!

Thank you so much Allison Benson for organizing our craft for yesterday! The Reward Jars were a big hit!! My kids can't wait to pull from the jar when they do something nice and kind.

Here are pics from the craft.............

The gals all busy working and chatting!

Happy for their finished product!

Amanda's jar.........minus camera shy Amanda

Our sweet guest for the day! Glad you joined us Rachel!

Lori working dilegently with a smile on her face!!

Meal planning meeting

***Thanks Corrina for posting this to the Facebook page!!!!******

How many times have you had a long day only to realize you didn't put any meat out to defrost? Or just didn't know what you were going to make that night? Well, come this Tuesday, September 27th, and we'll brainstorm ideas on how to plan for meals.

I am so looking forward to this meeting! I hope to find out more ways to save time and money for my family! Perhaps, maybe I can get some more ideas for "freezer" cooking?????

Now that fall/winter is upon us, all us mommas are looking for ways to quickly get out of the kitchen and get snuggled up with those sweet babies!!

Hope to see everyone there!

By the way, I will be at the FBCSD gym prior to the meeting getting my walk on if anyone else wants to join me!

God bless!!

Making a Successful Schedule

A big thanks goes out to our coordinator, Jenna Lofton for teaching us how to take into perspective just why and how we need to make a schedule for our families!!!! She, herself, has taken a year to come up with one that works great in her family (with a little tweaks here and there!). She also reminded us of the verse 1Timothy 5:14............

"Therefore I desire that the younger women marry, bear children, manage the house, give no opportunity to the adversary to speak reproachfully."

You have just the right amount of time in your day to do all the things God is calling you to.

Here is the recipe she gave us to go by..............................................................



1. List all the activities and times that are concreted (those half to's) into your schedule like parents day out, work, therapies, school drop off and pick ups, MOPS, wake up/bedtime, extracurricular activities, Bible studies, other mom's groups, etc.

2. MOM'S WISH LIST: List your priorities for yourself. Think of things that you NEED and WANT to accomplish. List times preferred and how much time each activity needs. Examples: Showering, exercise, quiet time, phone/computer time, "me time", cleaning, hobby, reading, favorite tv program, or Girls Night Out. While you are dreaming, go ahead and dream big-write down what your really wish you had time for.

You can use this wish list to fill in your daily schedule. Remember 20 minutes a day adds up to 10 hours a month and you can use this for your weekly/monthly schedule as well. Maybe just a Saturday afternoon here and there will help make your dreams come true.

3. We need to set aside time for our kids and be intentional. Based  upon your kid's needs, list your goals for each child and time needed to accomplish those goals. Goals can include: academic, physical, extracurricular, spirititual and social.

4. List out time robbers. It's good to know where you are spending your time. Time robbers are activitities that zap your time. They may be good things, but they may be taking more time than you want or realize. Setting boundaries with time robbers will allow you more time with your kids or help you accomplish your goals. Examples: Facebook/Twitter/blogging, television watching, exercise, computer time, cleaning, time on the phone, paying too much attention to detail, down time, shopping, extra extracurricular activities, friends, extended family, etc.

So ladies, get those pens/pencils out and start filling out those new schedules that have just popped into your head!!

Can't wait to see everyone at the next meeting!

Kick off meeting

MOMSENSE! Do you have any????

This morning turned out to be very successfull and FUN!! We had a great turnout from returning moms and even picked up a new one, welcome Vicky!!

The steering team performed their skit which seem to be a great success!! We all were winners no matter if we were a techno mom, falling apart, having it totally together or just don't have a clue!

We received our calendar for the year and a little homework for the next time we meet in September.

Just how will you spend your 168 hours???

Just wanted to share a couple of videos with you! Enjoy!



Count down anyone????

Yes, ladies....................

               It............

                            is................

                                            just...................

6 more days!!!!!!!

We can't wait to get together again!!! Be in prayer for returning mommas and all the new ones that we will be bringing in to this great ministry!!!

Get your game face on because it is gonna be FUN!!!!!!



It's a new year!!!

School has started, we have some cooler weather outside and those little ones are needing something to keep them occupied! 

Our fist meeting is August 23rd at 9:30 and we can't wait to get started!!

MOPPETS teachers are loaded with some great curriculum for the new year thanks to Melody and I hear we have some new volunteers to come love on our sweet kiddos!!

Steering committee: Don't forget our next meeting is August 22nd from 8-10PM. Come prepared to wrap any last minute loose ends, help with completing projects and setting up for our first meeting! Also, we are bringing the munchies for the first meeting, I'm thinking some muffins will be on my list!

Can't wait to get together with the gang again and meet our new mommas that will be coming!

See me if you need the new business cards or invite cards to hand out to potential mommas!!

Love and God bless!!!

Our time together again is slowly approaching!

MOPS International post this AM:

 I love my sleep! What time do you get up in the morning on an average day and how many hours of sleep do you get?

~~~~I know there are mommas out there that are getting ready to take some kiddos back to school along with having their preshcoolers, so it will be interesting to know your answers~~~

For my answer: I truly do not know just how long I sleep each night due to waking up several times either hurting or burning up! Now that school will be starting it looks as though I will be waking around 6:30AM to get all 3 kiddos dressed and ready. This will be bitter sweet for me though because now I will have more mommy time once they are all out of the vehicle and through those front doors!!

Now to hear some of your answers please..............................

A great story from MOPS International

http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.mom-ology.org%2Fpage.php%3Fpageid%3D3027&h=mAQAnSqhx

Check out this story mommas who have those precious babies in the crawling stage!

Any body missing our meetings???

Well, a new year is slowing creaping up on us and school will be starting soon for our kids which means it will be time for a whole new MOPS year!

During our steering meeting we came up with lots and lots of ideas for our meetings, MOMSENSE!!!

It's gonna be games, games, games and more games!!!! Lots of speakers and fun crafts!!

Mark your calendars for August 23rd at 9:30 AM and come prepared for fun, fun, fun!!!!!

A little something from a sister MOPS group

Corrina received this email and I thought I would share it with everyone that might have missed it.

> Hi,
>
> My name is Megan Honeycutt and I am the Director of Children’s Ministry,
> and MOPS Coordinator at Brainerd United Methodist Church. Our MOPS
> chapter is hosting a huge craft fair on Saturday, June 11th from 9 am to 2
> pm in our church’s fellowship hall. We would like to invite your chapter
> to come and see the wonderful crafts our vendors have available. We have
> crafters selling many different items such as: personalized children’s
> books, handmade children’s clothes, monogramming, handmade diaper bags,
> gourmet cupcakes, handmade jewelry, handmade candles, and much more! We
> have over 30 vendors! If you need more information feel free to contact
> me.
>
> Megan Honeycutt
> Director of Children's Ministry
> MOPS Coordinator
> Brainerd UMC
> (423)698-6951


Sounds like some great fun for us mommas and a chance to meet some new moms!!! I think it just might be on my to do list!! Hope everyone is having a great summer!!!

Summer is among us

So moms summer is officially here......or at least I think it is as I sit here and look at my google sidebar that states it is 92 degrees outside!!!!! Today we celebrate Memorial day and the great men and women who have fought or are fighting for our country!! Thank you and God bless you all!!!

Hope that each of you moms are getting a chance to spend some time with your sweet families and friends!!! Maybe some grilling, swimming, volleyball, etc. Whatever it may be that you are doing to pass the time and enjoy fellowship together, I pray that all will be safe!!

Until we meet again!!! Don't forget.....the picnic and play time at Pumpkin Patch park is soon approaching us!!

Our final meeting

It was such a blessing to take part in our final meeting and walk across the stage to receive our diplomas for completing the University of Momology. Thanks to all who took part in putting the ceremony together. Hope that all you moms feel as accomplished as I do! As soon as I got home I had to put my cap, diploma and certificate to be displayed for all to see. MOPS is such a great ministry for moms and it has been a huge blessing in my life! After spending this time with you ladies, I know I have made lifelong friends! I can't wait for the upcoming MNOs and summer play dates! Here's to a great year ladies! My hat is off to you all!!!

Appreciation Dinner for our Volunteers

Time Friday, May 6 · 6:30pm - 9:30pm

Location: Fellowship Hall-First Baptist Church Soddy Daisy

We have wonderful people behind the scenes who help make our meetings work. Moppets workers love on our kids while we are in our meetings, church staff help connect us to new members, and our mentors give us encouragement. Now, it's our turn to show them how much we care about them. Please come with your family. It's a Mexican-themed dinner, please bring along a main dish, side, dessert or drinks to share. We are expecting a large group, so keep that in mind while you prepare.

A big reminder for us busy moms

Humble Pie

By Jacy Bowers

It was a Sunday night at dinnertime, and I was exhausted from the weekend. My very active and talkative kids, combined with just getting over the flu, had me hoping for a quiet dinner before putting them down early for bed.

During the meal, I zoned out a little, letting my husband answer my son’s endless stream of questions. “Dad, what does a heart look like inside a person? Does it look like the same ones we draw on paper? Why does an octopus have three hearts?”

Wait, what? That got my attention and I chimed in saying, “Honey, that’s not true.”

"My husband and I were

genuinely impressed at our

first grader’s knowledge."

He assured us it was true. His teacher told him so. Just to appease his curiosity, we promised to look it up on the Internet after dinner, to show him what a real heart looks like and prove that an octopus doesn’t have three hearts.

After dinner, he reminded us to do our Internet check on hearts and guess what? An octopus does have three hearts. My husband and I were genuinely impressed at our first grader’s knowledge. We apologized for doubting him, telling him we learn from him as much as he learns from us. He just smiled. Seems that is something he has known all along.

Dear God, thank you for the unending questions and thoughts my child has! Help me to patiently learn from him just as he learns from me. Amen.



Do you ever get distracted???

A Great, Safe Place to Play

By Rhonda Headley

I’ve recently been babysitting an increasingly mobile seven-month-old who has just mastered sitting up. I thought such a milestone would allow me to snag a minute to myself. With her set up in the middle of the living room, surrounded by her favorite assortment of toys, I’d be free to check out for a few minutes. I carefully placed an array of colorful teething toys, cuddly toys and noise-makers within her arm’s reach for her to explore, make music with or just drool over.

"God gives us

everything we need,

yet we still want

what we shouldn’t."

Great idea right? Wrong! I failed to factor in an infant’s curiosity. It took her no time at all to discover the off-limits zone. She dropped the toys and scooted and rolled her way to the computer desk, the basket of diapers and to the pile of shoes on the floor. While I admired her determination to try out the computer, eat a diaper or gum a boot, I knew I had to redirect her. Calmly, I scooped her up and repositioned her in her circle of toys, praising it as a great, safe place to play for a while. With a grin and a grunt, she was on the move, headed straight for the off-limits zone yet again.

While later telling a friend of the baby’s exploits, she chuckled and remarked, “Well, isn’t that just like human nature? God gives us everything we need, yet we still want what we shouldn’t.” My friend’s observation gave me pause. How often do I get distracted by what’s just beyond my reach? How do I tell the difference between things that are good to strive for and things that will bring me harm? How encouraging to know I’ve got someone looking after me too and gently redirecting me to a great, safe place to play.

Dear God, how often you reveal my own tendencies through the actions of my child! Thank you for your gentle redirection in my life and the great, safe place you’ve prepared for me. Amen.

Another parenting tip

My Child Is Just Going Through The Motions

Sometimes children learn to go through the motions to just get through a discipline experience. They'll parrot the answers that they know you want to hear. You know that helping them change their hearts is the right thing to do, but you don't seem to be getting anywhere. What do you do?

"The answer must be bigger consequences." That tends to be what parents think of first, but the solution is usually more complicated. The key may be adding positive consequences that help children practice a heart change.

One mom said, "My twelve-year-old son was struggling with meanness. I had tried taking away privileges but that didn't seem to work. I decided to try something different. I told him each day to find three kind things he could do for his brother. He would have to report to me before he was free to go out and play. By focusing on the positive we began seeing some significant change."

This is a good idea but sometimes change is slow or doesn't seem to be there at all. In these cases, parents must take a two-pronged approach. First, set up a good routine and enforce it consistently. It's like a Jello mold. You're establishing boundaries for children and requiring right responses even though they don't seem to be able to assimilate change on a deeper level.

Then pray. After all, God is the one who can change a heart. Pray that your children will respond to the discipline and guidelines you set up. Tell your children that you're praying for them. Don't give up and just let them go. Continue to set the patterns and routines to be that container that they need to act rightly. Pray that God will breathe life into the container so that children aren't just acting right, but their hearts are in it too.

Look for small opportunities for dialogue, modeling, and correction that God might use to help them change. Find positive influences for your child. It's amazing how many times a youth leader at church can say the very same thing that you are saying at home but your kids will receive it better from someone else. Hang in there. The job of parenting requires a lot of faith and work. Both are necessary to help children make changes that will last.



***I truly enjoyed reading this one!! I am trying very hard now to use prayer and allow God to handle my very hard to discipline 5 year old!****

MopsInternational Email

Seriously?

By Holly Rowlette

When my daughter was three, I took her with me to a local department store to look for something. My plan was to get in and out like any good mother of a preschooler. So, we walked down the center aisle, the quickest route to our destination in the store. She protested and wanted to walk through the clothing racks. After much pleading on her part, I gave in and through the racks she walked. I was only three feet from her when all of a sudden, a clothing rack began to lean over and quickly created a domino effect. One, then two, then three, then four and five racks full of clothes later, we had destroyed the women’s section of the local Stein Mart.

"We all have those

mommy moments

where we just want to

crawl under a rock"

Seriously? Yes, seriously, my dear Gracie Girl single-handedly toppled five racks of women’s clothing. I was mortified! After quickly assessing that she was fine, I desperately scanned for the quickest escape route. A sales associate came over and said, “Oh, don’t worry about it, these things happen.” Seriously?, I thought. They certainly don’t happen to me! I tried helping the sales lady lift the racks but she insisted I leave them alone. I hastily made my purchase while threatening Gracie with “Don’t touch anything!”

That was a day of ultimate embarrassment. We all have those mommy moments where we just want to crawl under a rock and hope no one saw or heard what our children did. I think those things happen to help us realize we’re not SuperMom. We aren’t always going to have it all together. In fact, when we start to think we do, our kids are quick to humble us and put life back in perspective. I guess there could be worse ways to learn.

Dear God, help me to remember I’m not SuperMom. Instead, lead me to become the mom you’ve created me to be: full of faults, but perfectly equipped to mother my unique child.



MNO for January

Check out the fun we had at Project night working on our scrapbooking, crocheting, bowmaking, etc.

 

Powerful MomEMail from MOPS International

Stuck On You
By Meko Kapchinsky, mom of one

About two years ago I managed to give myself five successive concussions over the course of a year and a half. Consequently, between all the medication and head trauma, I had morphed into a drooling (literally), socially inept individual. Hands down, the toughest thing to deal with was my inability to care for my beloved Sophia. My two-year-old daughter couldn’t grasp why Mommy was sleeping the bulk of the day, instead of spending time with her doing crafts, baking, or playing tag. My mom, who cared for Sophia while I mended, tried explaining why I was M.I.A., but to no avail. Sophia desperately wanted to connect with me. I too, mourned the loss of our previous level of interaction, until I figured out that a drooling mom is still a mom.

"I am so thankful

for the lessons it taught me

about cementing the bond

between mother and child."

Working as a team with my husband and mom, I instituted a ritual that allowed Sophia and I to spend quality time together. After my mom and husband fed Sophia dinner and brushed her teeth, they brought her into my bed and we would take silly pictures on my phone camera. In between goofy grins, giggling fits, and sticking out our tongues at the camera, Sophia had a chance to reconnect.

Two years later and concussion free, Sophia and I still take silly pictures together. It’s become “our thing”, our glue as a mother and daughter duo. While that year and a half was tough, I am so thankful for the lessons it taught me about cementing the bond between mother and child.
Dear God, thank you for the bond you’ve created between my child and me. Help me find ways to continue to strengthen it, regardless of my circumstances.

A great email from MOPS International

You’re Not Alone
By Christa Hogan, mom of two

After a particularly long, sleepless night, I decided I’d earned a latte. I dropped my oldest son off at preschool and headed to Starbucks with the baby. But as soon as I pulled into the drive-through line and placed my order, he woke up and started to cry. I knew he was fed and clean, but he wouldn’t stop crying no matter what I tried. My car was blocked in the drive-through line, and I had no choice but to wait it out.

"I was still exhausted.

But I was no longer alone"

Hormonal, exhausted, frazzled and leaking breast milk, I finally pulled up to the window for my latte after what felt like an eternity. I was fighting back tears as the barista at the window handed me my drink. But when I tried to pay he shook his head.

“The lady ahead of you in line already paid for your order,” he explained. “She said, ‘From one mom to another.’ ”

I felt a wave of relief. The baby was still crying. I was still leaking. I was still exhausted. But I was no longer alone. I was reminded that I was part of a larger, sometimes anonymous, community of moms doing their best for their kids. I don’t remember if the baby stopped crying before I drove all the way home, but I do remember how good that latte tasted.

Dear God, you designed us for community. Teach me to both receive and contribute to making the most of mine.

Learning some more on parenting

Parenting Tip
Teach Children How to Listen

A very important skill that children will need as adults is the ability to listen. Listening isn't easy. Most people would rather talk. Children interrupt, yell, and talk over each other, often resulting in misunderstanding. Teaching children how to listen can be a way to help them become less selfish.

One mom told how she taught her children to listen. "I use this technique whenever my boys are in conflict over a toy. I sit them down with the toy on the table and say, 'You can play with the toy as soon as you both agree on a plan.' I encourage them each to share an idea and listen to the other's idea.

I teach them about compromise, working together, and sharing, but I let them work it out. Sometimes they'll both be stubborn and I'll have them stay there until they can agree on a plan. I coach them along when they need it. They must always report back to me before continuing to play, providing an opportunity for me to affirm unselfishness and cooperation."

It can be fun to teach a five-year-old how to persuade a two-year-old, or help two eight-year-olds negotiate a solution. Conflict is turned into cooperation through listening.

I (Scott) like to joke with children, "Do you know why God made lips for your mouth but not for your ears?" or, "Why do you think God gave you one mouth and two ears? It's because God wants you to quiet your mouth sometimes, so you can listen."

James 1:19 gives children very practical advice. "Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry." As a parent, you have many opportunities to teach this valuable skill.

What are some ways you've been able to teach your children to listen to each other?

MOPS International Email

SOS

By Holly Rowlette

Sometimes it is hard to ask for help, isn’t it? As strong women, we want to be super moms. We want to look like we have it all together and can do it all. Work, volunteer, clean house, cook dinner, organize play dates, manage the house. And when challenges come (sick child, deployment, money gets tight, loss of a job, childcare falls apart) we resist asking for help and even refuse friendly offers. We still want to have it all together and act like we can persevere.

"I’m a mom

and I can’t do it all!"

I learned this lesson a few years ago when a friend offered to watch my kids. I kindly declined. She reminded me that I would be robbing my kids of a fun time with her kids, robbing her of the blessing of helping me and robbing myself of some much-needed down time. And she was exactly right. From that moment on, I have been less fearful of what others will think if I ask for help.
This week, let your friend be the blessing. Let her bring you a meal, watch your kids, drop off some groceries or help you fold laundry. Say it with me … “I’m a mom and I can’t do it all!” Say it again if you need to.
Dear God, teach me to accept help and to be willing to reciprocate as needed. Use me to teach my children about the joys of giving and receiving.

Parenting tip for today

An Indirect Approach to Sibling Conflict

One great way to challenge the sibling conflict problems in a household is to play games with your children. Games are miniature scenarios about real life. Whether you're playing a board game, a card game, or some kind of communication or role playing game, children have to use relational skills.

Playing games can teach children how to win, how to lose, how to show mercy, and how to talk humbly. As you play games with your children, model honor. Have fun and enjoy the game but avoid put downs, bragging, boasting, hurtful revenge, and meanness. That seems to be hard even for some parents these days.

Teach children how to win without being hurtful, how to lose without complaining, how to make a good move with humility, and show honor whether you're winning or losing. Kids need to see these things modeled in games so they can learn how to handle similar situations in life.

Choose your comments wisely as you correct or confront others who may not handle themselves well. You may let some things go, but your comments are important and children learn from the things you say.

You may see selfishness and bad attitudes demonstrate themselves. Look for loving ways to correct while still enjoying the game. Play games regularly and continue to look for ways to communicate honor and challenge dishonoring behavior and words. You'll be surprised at how much you can teach without your children even realizing they're in a classroom.
What are some ways you've been able to teach through games?

2011 Convention coming up.......

New Parenting Tip

As I was reading this in my inbox today I realized.....hey, maybe that is how I need to do it??

Teaching Children When You Mean Business


When we teach parents to avoid responding to their children in anger we get a common reaction, "But my kids won't obey unless I get angry."

And you're probably right, but only because you've taught your children to wait until you're angry before they have to obey. You give your kids cues to know when you mean business. Those cues tell your child that it's time to respond because your action point is coming next.

There is a definite connection between action point and anger. Many parents use the energy from anger to finally take action. When parents learn to tighten up their action point, then they don't have to use anger as the motivator. In fact, anger can often be a flag that your action point isn't tight enough.

If you find that you've relying on anger to motivate your children, then it's time to make a change. First, though, you need to develop a new plan. What signals do you want to use to indicate that it's time to clean up, or it's time to go? Maybe you'll use the child's name and obtain eye contact and use the word "now" in the instruction.

When you're ready to make the change, talk with your children. Explain that you have been wrong in teaching them to wait until you get angry before they start obeying. From now on you are going to tell them once, then comes the action. If your child doesn't respond to the new cues then move right to a consequence.

You may use a warning at first as your children are learning to respond to new cues. This helps them see that you mean business, but don't add several warnings or you defeat the purpose. Develop a routine with your kids so that they know when discussion or delays are over and obedience is required.

We don't encourage parents to always demand obedience. Children also learn from negotiation, compromise, and cooperation, but there is a time for children to respond whether they like it or not. Your kids need to know when that is and clarifying your action point will help them learn it.

This tip was taken from the CD series, Eight Secrets to Highly Effective Parenting, by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN. You can also learn about an Action Point by reading the book Home Improvement, The Parenting Book You Can Read to Your Kids.

Memory verse for month of January

Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Deuteronomy 6:5-7


Big THANKS goes to Jenna for preparing this memory verse for us!!!

A great tip for moms

Parenting Tip
Be Firm Without Being Harsh


Some parents believe that the only way to be firm is to be harsh. Firmness says that a boundary is secure and won't be crossed without a consequence. Harshness uses angry words and increased volume to make children believe that parents mean what they say. Some parents have assumed that firmness and harshness must go together. One mom said, "The thought of separating the two is like listening to a foreign language—it sounds nice but doesn't make any sense."

How do you make the change? Two things will help you remove harshness from your interaction with your children: Dialogue less and show less emotion. In an attempt to build relationship, some parents spend too much time dialoguing about instructions. They try to defend their words, persuade their children to do what they're told, or logically explain the value of obeying. This is often counterproductive. Parents then resort to anger to end the discussion, complicating matters further.

"But," one mom said, "I thought talking and showing emotion are signs of a healthy family, leading to closeness in family life." And that is true when they are used in the right way. Unfortunately, when added to the instruction process, these two ingredients confuse children and don't give them the clear boundaries they need. These are two good things, just in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Firmness requires action, not anger. Having a toolbox of consequences is important to help move children along in life. It's not optional. Some parents use anger as their consequence. These parents need more tools that will help their children make lasting changes.

If you find yourself being harsh, take time to reevaluate your response. More action, less yelling can go a long way to bring about significant change.

What are some ways you've been able to remove harshness from your parenting?

A reminder to the wonderful moms

STRONG PERSON

A strong person knows how to keep their life in order.

Even with tears in their eyes, they still manage to say "I'm ok" with a smile.

Is always there for you when you need them but doesn't want to bother you with their problems





"Mom, you just need to give it to God"

****Here is the recent email from MOPSInternational******


I Give Up
By Jacy Bowers
It’s the end of the holiday season and I’m just managing to catch my breath. But the call to start the New Year off with a bang still beckons. How do I keep the post-Christmas stress at bay? I have a feeling the answer lies within a recent family lesson.

Just two days before Christmas, my family prepared for a relaxing dinner out as a sort of reward for the busyness we knew would follow. The kids were excited to get out and I was looking forward to a nice dinner with the family, with someone else doing the serving.
"Mom, you just need to give it to God."

But then we received a call from a tenant with a clogged toilet at our rental property. Finding a plumber with good rates and the ability to complete the job before Christmas proved a struggle. Remaining relaxed at our family dinner an hour later when the plumber called to say he’d need to charge more in order to finish the job proved an even bigger struggle.
I got off the phone and couldn’t help but start venting to my husband about the added cost. The stress threatened to bubble over, then my seven-year-old said, “Mom, you just need to give it to God.” Wow, the simple faith out of the mouth of a child. He was exactly right: it was out of my control. I looked at him and decided I was just going to enjoy my yummy food and my precious family. God can handle the rest.

Dear God, thank you for how my child shows me the faith that I need to hear, so simple and honest.

Parenting Tips from biblicalparenting.org

Identify the Cues of Anger
Helping children deal with anger is an important task of parenting. Many parents report that there is no time between the trigger and the response in their children. Before we can teach children anger management, we must first help them see anger coming on. James 1:19 says that we should be slow to anger. Here are some ways to help children slow down the process.

Talk about the physical indicators that anger is approaching. These cues are different for each person. You may even use yourself as an example. How can you tell when you're starting to get angry? Maybe it's furrowed eyebrows, tightened facial muscles, rapid breathing, raised shoulders, hollow feeling in the chest, clenched teeth, tightened fists, pursed lips, wide eyes, or a change in tone or pitch of your voice. Identifying these early warning signs of anger can help children feel it coming on before they react.

Point out these early warning signs in others. Virtually all children's animated videos contain exaggerated facial features to depict emotions. Watch a video and point out the times when someone gets angry. How could you tell? This exercise is helpful for identifying one's own cues but also helps children see anger coming on in others. If you teach children how to respond to the anger of others, they can learn to be peacemakers instead of troublemakers.

Take action earlier. Once you see the cues, stop the escalation before it starts. "Bill, it looks like you’re getting upset, come over here and settle down before things get out of hand." Earlier intervention will eventually help your children make those same choices for themselves and teach them how to manage anger in healthy ways.
What are some things you do to help kids see the anger coming on? Click here to tell us about it.
This parenting tip comes from the book, Home Improvement, The Parenting Book You Can Read to Your Kids by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.

Check this out for a laugh..........

http://www.expotv.com/client/widget/8e8c07dcd78a7d03f6dab68f264a5f6a.html (If this link doesn't work go here......... http://www.krastfirsttaste.com/

Kraft First Taste is a great website to find coupons and easy recipes. I just love this site!! Clink on the link above and see their newest videos. It's called "You Gotta LOL". Trust me........I did LOL! This lady is great!

Enjoy these to pass your time since we are stuck inside waiting on the beautiful snow to melt!

“How Do You Get Any Work Done?”

“How Do You Get Any Work Done?”
By Rozalynn Goodwin


When I tell people I work in the office three days a week and from home two days a week , they first say how impressed they are that my employer offers a flexible work schedule option. Their next response is usually a question: “How do you get any work done?”

I could easily give an answer to that question when my daughter was only months old, sleeping 15 plus hours a day and not crawling or walking. She would occasionally cry or whimper, but as long as she was fed, burped and changed, managing her along with my work and house now seems like it was a piece of German chocolate cake. When I had research to do for my job, I would read papers and articles out loud to her, and she would just sit in her bouncer kicking and giggling with glee. I joke that, at age two, she probably has more knowledge about health care than the average adult!

Oh, those were the days. Now, if she’s quiet and alone in a room for more than a few minutes, there will likely be some unsolicited crayon, milk or Vaseline artwork on our microfiber couch, beige carpet or in books that were not made for coloring.

Mothers who work from home actually juggle three jobs: employee, mother and homemaker, and doing all of these with a mobile preschooler is challenging, but doable. I’ve put a few things into practice that I hope can assist you, whether your work at home is an assignment from an employer or the laundry for the week.

Write an outline for the day. The outline should include scheduled breaks dedicated to time with your child (15 minute breaks and a break for lunch) and naptime (for your child, of course).

Rip the outline to shreds and throw it in the trash can.

Dig in the trash can to recover and piece together the ripped up outline. Although you can’t predict a day with a preschooler, planning for the day still helps.

Make sure you have age-appropriate toys that assist your child in entertaining himself or herself.

Embrace educational TV in moderation. I know many think TV for children is horrible, but certain programs can entertain and educate your children and give you some time to concentrate on work.

Take advantage of time your child is sleeping. I schedule my work to begin before she wakes up and I plan conference calls or work needing my undivided attention during her naptime. I also work “after hours” if necessary, particularly once my husband comes home from work and can care for our daughter.

Get some help. See if there is a “Mommy’s Morning Out” at a church in your neighborhood or ask one of your friends who has some free time during the day to take your child to the park for an hour or two. Also, maybe you can find someone to help you with some household cleaning.

Finally, don’t be so hard on yourself. Often, mothers who work from home feel they are neglecting their children if they are concentrating on their work and that they are neglecting their work if they are concentrating on their children. It is impossible to do and have it all, but I’m sure that you are doing all you can to be the best mother, employee and/or homemaker for your family.

Rozalynn Goodwin is founder of The Motherhood Priority, a non-profit advocacy organization working to strengthen mother-friendly policies in the workplace. She resides in Columbia, SC with her husband, 4 year-old daughter and newborn son. For more information about The Motherhood Priority, visit www.themotherhoodpriority.com.

Bringing in the new year!

Well 2011 is finally here!! Reading through my emails I found this great one from MOPS and wanted to share it with those who don't receive the emails.

Enjoy!


                                                           A Clean Slate      By Tally Flint


January is a very minimalist month for us. After the clutter of December, I want to clear out not only our home, but also my heart. There seems to be something so fresh and clean about a new year.


"With God’s help, I’m looking at a clean slate – completely free of mistakes."

I heard a woman speak once about cultivating a practice of “do-overs” in her family. She told the story of how her young son stormed into the house one day and slammed the door behind him, something she’d asked him repeatedly not to do. She described the angry frustration that bubbled up inside her, and then the thought that challenged her to offer him a “do-over.” He accepted the offer and exited the house, paused a moment, and then reentered, this time closing the door softly behind him. He learned a lesson, and she kept the close connection between them.
Could you use a do-over this year? I could. Good thing God is in the business of do-overs. I love knowing that the less-than-sterling moments of my 2010 don’t have to follow me into 2011. With God’s help, I’m looking at a clean slate – completely free of mistakes. And while I’m sure to start racking those up soon, I cling to the truth that they are not what define me or my mothering. And they’re not what define you either. Here’s to a fresh start!




Dear God, help me to revel in the freshness of a new year. Work through me to mold me into the woman and mother you have called me to be.

Can't wait to see everyone at our next meeting on January 11th! Bring a friend and come ready to have a wonderful chat!